Important Life Goals

Kanye says that when you have plans for the future, you should make it public so that the world can hold you accountable. Kanye is always right. So, here are some of the life goals I've thought up recently:

I will become part of an ABBA tribute band/impersonator group and travel the country as Anni-Frid, or maybe Agnetha.

I will be rich and successful enough that I can work from a beautifully decorated home office and hire my husband to be my secretary.

I will buy a house at some beach and give it a really stupid name.

I will own a pug and name it Winston Churchill. (Also, I will own an octopus named Ruth Bader Ginsburg.)

As a part of my mid-life crisis phase, I will open a classy soul food restaurant with my sister called Chubby Bubby's. It's logo will be an enormous black man eating chicken.

When I'm ridiculously wealthy, I will design a line of high-end bras for sizes DD and up. I think I'll call it something cheeky like "Jugs" or "Stacked." Then Target will beg me to do a special line for them and I will accept because their "plus-size bra" section is appalling.

Now, hold me accountable, readers!
LOVE,
Allie